Society vs. Democracy

Since the invasion of the capitol the other day, I’ve heard a lot of doom and gloom on podcasts and social media about the “end of “our” democracy.” That’s not a typo; I put quotation marks around both the whole phrase and the word our. I’ll explain.

It’s not our democracy. That’s one of the great fallacies of it — that it belongs to the people, to us. It doesn’t and never has. The democracy under which we live belongs, of course, to the people who gain power through it: presidents, senators, congressmen and women, judges, sheriffs and their deputies, etc. For it is they who get to make all the rules of democracy. They get to write the laws and enforce them. It’s that simple. So unless it’s a politician or other government bureaucrat speaking, “our” is wholly inappropriate in the phrase “end of our democracy.”

As for the quotation marks around the whole thing — the “end of our democracy,” it seems that democracy, in this construction, is being substituted for and used interchangeably with society. If society and democracy were two separate ideas in these doom-and-gloomers’ heads, they wouldn’t be foretelling the End Times like this. They wouldn’t be speaking with such a tone of exasperation, of resignation, of sadness.

But somehow, the two ideas have been conflated; a good many people believe that the political organization of the nation-state in which we live somehow represents and affects the everyday lives of most of the people.

It doesn’t. Not really.

On the margins, it does. And those margins are not irrelevant. The amount of money you lose in taxes each year matters. Whether or not police detain you matters. Whether or not another nation starts dropping bombs on your hometown matters. But those things don’t happen every day. Not even close.

No, democracy — a political system — has very little to do with society — the aggregated interactions of individual people. The two couldn’t be more different.

If we played Word Association with democracy, for example, we might use words like campaign; representatives; impeachment; filibuster; law enforcement; majority rule; politics; scandal; insurrection. We might say that democracy is two wolves and one sheep voting on what’s for dinner.

Want to know what society is? Word Association: cooperation; respect; trust; friendship; friendliness; exchange.

Better yet, let me show you what it is. Step outside. Do you see the people pushing their babies in strollers? Do you see them cooing to their babies when they stop to rest on benches? That is society.

Start walking. Do you see the people walking their dogs? Do you see the brief smile they exchange when they pass each other on the sidewalk and their dogs briefly sniff the other’s butt? That is society.

Go a little further. Watch the woman in the headphones jog past you. Notice how you heard her footsteps behind you and naturally, almost automatically, moved to the side to let her pass? That has nothing whatsoever to do with democracy. That’s society.

Walk into the little market there on the corner. Pick out a bag of peanuts and bring it to the cashier. Did you hear that? He said, “How’s it going?” And what’s that you said in response? “Good, how are you?” You’re both good, in that moment — for you are making a trade that benefits you both. He gets a dollar-fifty. You get a bag of peanuts. That’s society.

Go back out to the street. Call your brother, your father, a friend from high school. Bring up an old inside joke and observe how your cheeks rise and you let out a bit of air. That’s called a laugh, and that, too, is society.

It’s not to be confused with democracy. It exists and endures despite of the divisions and bad blood that democracy whips up. Society, in fact, has endured far worse. It has endured wars, pandemics, stock market crashes. It has endured coups and natural disasters.

It has endured isolation. Friendship was fostered at Auschwitz.

Society is resilient beyond belief, for it is forever in our best interests to be pleasant to each other.

Democracy might or might not be crumbling. That’s a problem for politicians, lobbyists, and bureaucrats, in faraway cities and elegant buildings, to sort out.

Pay them no heed. Pay democracy no mind. Focus on what really matters: the society in front of your face.

If you enjoyed this story — and even if you didn’t — you should check out my book, Ticketless: How Sneaking Into The Super Bowl And Everything Else (Almost) Held My Life Together.